


you don't have to say i love you (to say i love you)

by commonemergency



Series: ficmas 2017. [12]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, long distance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-13
Updated: 2017-12-13
Packaged: 2019-02-14 04:03:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12999435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/commonemergency/pseuds/commonemergency
Summary: There was power in vulnerability, it was something that Dan was still learning.prompt: Phil goes away and Dan misses him





	you don't have to say i love you (to say i love you)

“Does absence really make the heart grow fonder?” Phil asks, slightly amused at the fact that it’s only been a couple of days and so far and Dan and Phil have Skyped each other every night -- if only for a few minutes. Phil had been invited to some family reunion, they all congregated in his parents house in Isle of Man and it was normally harmonious, the only fights were about who did the best in charades, because while they’re all adults- it’s still fun to play these kind of games sometimes. 

It’s almost like Phil brings new traditions back home to Dan and their friends. 

“I dunno,” Dan snorts, he’s been scrolling through his tumblr for half an hour now, trying to find motivation to edit the gaming video that he promised Phil he would do. He feels a bit foggy today. A little bit hazy, but not enough to have him completely close up shop, which meant deleting all the apps that he normally uses until he feels better, because he doesn’t want to talk to anyone and he doesn’t want to say anything that he’d regret in the morning. He knows that maybe it would be better to just give Phil his phone but it was also a weird comfort thing to hold it even if he didn’t use it. 

“I kind of miss putting my feet on you.” Phil admits, trying to make Dan laugh. 

It works because Dan shakes his head and snorts a little. “Yeah, I don’t. I quite like having the bed to myself and not having to deal with your icy feet.” 

Dan can hear laughter in the background, he wishes he were there sometimes. He wants to share those precious family moments with Phil, even if the people would overwhelm him a little. It’s better than feeling lonely. Except he’s really not alone. Wirrow and Bryony had come over hours ago to eat dinner with Dan and watch a movie, but they left because Dan was feeling a bit restless and they had things to do the next morning anyway. 

“I think my cousins just got back from one of the only pubs nearby,” Dan watched as Phil had looked back at the door and tried to listen. 

“Right.” Dan was doing that thing where he was pretending he wasn’t paying attention although being very aware of what was going on. It was that point in the night where they both needed to sleep but also didn’t want to hang up because they still had a few days to go and it seemed a bit ridiculous now that Dan thought of it, because they spend so much time together and yet the _feeling_ of being long distance sucks. 

“What are you doing?” Dan asks, his eyes flickering to see Phil watching him intently. 

“Nothing. I’m just thinking of the fact that my aunts want to go on a whale watching tomorrow. _Whale watching?_ My own mother betrayed me and agreed knowing that I’m going to throw up.” Phil shakes his head at the thought. 

Dan smirks a little. “Serves you right for leaving me.” He liked to be petty, if he was honest, they both had a weird sick pleasure out of the other doing something they didn’t want to do. Although he did wish he was there to rub his back, because that helped sometimes. 

“Thanks.” Phil’s voice was a monotone. They had held a long stare before Phil had cracked. 

“So you _do_ miss me.” 

Dan had pursued his lips and looked up, a finger on his chin before he shrugged. “Nah. Me and the delivery guy hit it off pretty well. He looked a bit like Lance Black.” 

Phil rolls his eyes, he’d say something about the man at the bakery that they liked to go to here, but it looked like Dan needed to joke about it, as if it helped sort out what he was really feeling; it was a coping mechanism that Phil had come to realize. 

“Yeah? Invite me to your wedding.” Phil tries hard to fight the smile, but he can’t help it when he sees Dan’s cheeks start to flush. 

“Marriage? Nah mate, we’re a domestic partnership kind of people, me and doppleganger Lance.” 

Phil nods his head, as if he’s considering it before he hears Dan snort. 

“How much shit are you going to give me if I say I do… I do really miss you?” Dan quietly says after, he looks away from the screen, because sometimes confessing these kind of things was hard -- even if he shouldn’t be ashamed of it. 

“None.” Phil still looked at him like he’s the only person in the universe and the warm tingly feeling that Dan felt never really went away. 

“Okay.” Dan says, letting out a breath of relief. _Okay_ , he thinks. 

There was power in vulnerability, it was something that Dan was still learning. 

“I miss you too, Dan.” 

It was like all that pent up anxiety that Dan had been harboring was slowly disintegrating, his body was tired now and he wanted to sleep, even if it meant sleeping alone. Dan yawned at the thought, and nodded his head. 

“I’ll see you soon?” Dan didn’t know why he was asking. He already knew. 

“ _A lot sooner than you think._ ” Phil smiled, tapping the screen a little and Dan had done the same; it was in their way of saying, ‘ _I love you’_. 

“Goodnight Phil.” Dan was about to exit out of the tab, but he waited. 

“Goodnight Dan.” _Tap, tap_ , and he was gone.

Dan had closed his laptop and set it by the side of the bed, and he turned the lights off and cuddled a pillow. His phone had been on the charger for a while now so he didn’t need to worry about that. He closed his eyes and tried to think about what he could do tomorrow when he heard his phone go off. 

Dan reached out to look at the message, which was Phil texting him the warthog emoji. Dan had bit back a smile as he replied back with two of them.

It was another way of saying, ‘ _I love you_ ’. Dan and Phil had many of them.


End file.
